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Life's Little Lessons

"If you ask me what I came into this life to do, I will tell you: I came to live out loud." – Emile Zola

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ownership

Own It

A couple of weeks ago, I showed up at the vet for an appointment with two dogs only to be told, “I’m sorry. Your appointment isn’t until tomorrow.” But it was on my calendar. I vividly remember booking the appointment the week before and going over the date. Could I be wrong? Perhaps. Do I think I was? I truly don’t.

And tomorrow didn’t suit.

I have had happier moments. And apparently kinder ones.

And this week, another vet appointment. I walked into the reception area and was greeted with a smile from the vet tech, the same vet tech whom said several weeks ago, “I’m sorry. Your appointment isn’t until tomorrow.”

As soon as I saw her, I remembered that I wasn’t quite the kindest as I walked out the door with two dogs wrapped around my feet who were most likely wondering why the heck they were walking in and then quickly walking back out.

Silence and *possible* stomping speaks rather loudly.

Truth was, I was mad. Was it because I cleared my morning and loaded two excitable dogs into my Jeep and drove across town which is never easy or convenient during a work day? Was it because I didn’t want to be wrong and admit I may have made a mistake with the date? Was I expecting whomever made my appointment to be held to a higher standard, one of perfection, than I myself would be willing to held to?

Grace indeed is a crooked road.

But is a doable one.

As soon as I sat down, I apologized. I told the vet tech I was sorry for not being the kindest the last time I was there and I left it at that and made no excuses.

She accepted my apology and told me that my silence *and my stomping* didn’t quite seem like me and maybe I was just having a bad day. Perhaps other things were going on.

Boy were they ever.

I wish I could say that I *never* behave badly and that I am the poster child for good behavior but I obviously have my moments and some of those moments are rather large. I take my frustration out on innocent people after I allow it to build its home in me deep and wide. Through a series of unfortunate events, I’m learning that it’s important to recognize the WHY and then make amends with the HOW.

It’s important when you realize that you’ve stepped outside yourself to allow your heart to be searched so you can figure out what is REALLY going on in it. I wish I could say that I could do the figuring out all on my own but I can’t. I get snippets here and snippets there but if I really want to be the person I say I want to be, to be the person that God says I already am, then I need His help. And He gives it.

And when He gives it, there is always a small charge, a price to pay on my end. Recognizing my error or places of potential growth usually cost me the things that I often try to hold dear and close like pride, the very presentation of myself. It’s humbling to make the journey to the offering slab and lay my heart in front of another person and ask for forgiveness and admit I made a mistake.

It’s called vulnerability.

You cannot change without searching your heart and taking responsibility for your behavior. You are kidding yourself if you think you can maneuver around this process and negate this step. And if you are in a relationship with another person who refuses to take ownership of their actions and would rather place blame then take ownership, you are in a relationship with a stubborn-hearted person and the same pattern will most likely cycle back around again and repeat themselves. It’s the very definition of insanity.

If your heart gets checked and you realize that you’ve stepped outside yourself an inch or two…own it. Say you are sorry. Be sincere. Don’t make excuses. And if your heart is rarely checked…you are the author and perfector of your own faith and I wish you well.

It is very hard to be in a relationship with someone who is never wrong.

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ownership

I saw him standing by the door, waiting, so I approached him a little slowly. Who is this strange man on my doorstep? “Can I help you sir?” He obliged with a smile and slowly shrugged his shoulders while standing in front of me. “I was delivering your parts today and I forgot one of them. It’s not the companies fault, it is mine. I completely forgot to put it in the van.”

He was a breath of fresh air on this chilly Spring day and I said, “It’s ok. It happens to all of us.”

Lest not we forget that it does.

But unfortunately, many of us do. Many of us forget or ignore all together we have a part.

The other week I had someone call our office and complain about one of our drivers’ not stopping to pick up their student. It just so happens that driver was ME, and guess what? I DID stop. ON TIME. But it supposedly wasn’t their fault their student missed the bus, it was easier to default to it being someone else wrong doing.

HAPPENS. ALL. THE. TIME. 

Got kids? Then you understand.

Friends, is this fair? Of course not but what in life is, right? I had a choice to make in it? I had to honestly look at my part…did I make that stop and was I on time? Yes. I’m really sorry that student missed the bus but I showed up and did my part. I’m sad to say, someone else didn’t but it happens right?

Yes. It happens to all of us.

But my delivery man today won my respect. He showed up and took one for the team and has my vote for office. He was humble, honest and is the type of person I instantly can put my trust into. Could he of blamed someone else for the missing part? Absolutely. Did he? Absolutely not.

Life Lesson of the Day: Be honest. Own your part. Eat crow if you have to. Come to the table as you are, apologize where you need to and don’t take ownership of something that is not yours to take on.

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