I recently bought a book at an airport bookstore and read half of it on a plane from San Francisco to Detroit. It was about relationships as well as other fun, real-life topics and in the first chapter, the author used lobsters to set the stage for the his message.
It was a good point but I heard an entirely different message.
I’m sure what he wrote was great and good but what I got out of it was this: Female lobsters will shed their shell when it’s time to mate, exposing herself to not only other predators but jealous and often aggressive female competitors in the process.
Not very many of them make it home thanks to this vulnerable practice but this tid-but of knowledge showed me how important it is, when it comes to relationships, that we let down our guard and take off our hard exteriors that often keep us safe.
Because if we don’t, we can’t create new life. I mean, we can stay safe but that’s about it.
Yes I just went there.
So of course I read the naked lobster analogy and instantly applied it to my own life.
Because that’s what I do.
So life’s little lesson in the airplane gave me the balls to go home and practice vulnerability.
It didn’t really go the greatest.
What I learned from the rejection was that vulnerability can be humiliating. I felt naked and exposed, my guard was down and everything in me hurt.
I was indeed a female lobster laying her shell down and I got eaten by a predator.
Because there is always a but…
But, I am glad I did it. I realize that vulnerability is not about getting an idealized outcome to take place. Vulnerability is about being your truest self, even if you feel all open and exposed and raw and of you have any open wound…good luck. IT WILL HURT.
However the pain reveals to you what you are willing to settle for and what you are willing to go after…
WHO YOU ARE.
So dearest friend, if you are looking for new life in a relationship, in YOU…shed your shell and get naked like a lobster.