A couple of weeks ago, I came into the office to find a frantic woman had left a message on our office machine. “Please call me back. I am so sorry. I want to come in and talk to you.”
About what? I had no idea.
So I called her back and left a message, disconcerted as I was, and three days a later a letter showed up in the mail.
“The other day I was traveling down Main Street and I past one your school buses when it had its red lights activated. A student was getting off and…”
She cried. About died. Went and saw her priest.
She went on and on in her three page letter about how sorry she was and how she will never do that again as she realizes now the damage she could have caused by not paying attention. She left me her name and her number and a copy of her DRIVERS LICENSE in case I felt the need to turn her in.
She would do it herself but she wanted to leave her fate in my hands.
I couldn’t even.
She is sixty-seven years old.
I’ve thought about that woman every day for sixteen days. At some point in my day, my mind runs to her and sits with her, for just a bit and I say,”
“You are forgiven,” because I hope she has left herself off the hook.
“Teach me your ways,” because her grieving heart is intoxicating and a commonplace abnormality. She had not just given me lip service. I FELT her sincerity and repentance.
And I bet all the school buses in the world, she will never run the red lights of another bus. She will be more aware and alert while she is driving because her actions told me she wasn’t just sorry.
Remorse is easy to muster in us all, especially if we are caught.
No driver turned her in that day. No State Police showed up at my door. No school called.
But she did.
If you take it upon yourself to grieve and mourn over your actions, good for you. I got your back and will cheer you on regardless of what it is that you did. Seriously, a heart that checks itself against itself is teachable and open to moving forward. It makes changes.
One that’s not, probably not. And those are the hearts you need to be watchful over…