I remember watching a documentary on television when I was in high school about air traffic control personnel. I vaguely remember hearing the words, “High rate of stress that often leads to anxiety and depression,” and I felt sorry for the poor souls that chose high levels of stress as their career. At the time, I was preparing myself for my first year of college as a Sociology major with the goal of one day obtaining a Masters in Counseling. What did I know about massively large vehicles, traffic patterns and safety, let alone high rates of stress that leads to anxiety or depression?
I was 18. My parents paid for my car insurance.
20 years later. Ask me what I do.
My husband and I are school bus contractors for our local district.
Ask me what my job looks like on any given day.
Air traffic control personnel, but with buses. High levels of stress, not always, but there are days and with a husband out of the country on a missions trip, stress runs high.
Luckily for me, I am surrounded by amazingly great people. “Can I help?”
“Yes. Yes you can.”
In the long run, one of my helpers is also a very dear friend who when I mentioned attending her Bible study this evening as she helped me from point A to point B, said “Don’t even.”
Maybe she said something else, like “I hope you can make it,” or “Try really, really hard to come,” but I’m pretty confident she said something that totally let me off the hook because she knew I had a good hour left of work, two hours from Bible studies start.
**Because she knew I had left my kids home alone. Because she knew my chicken was still laying frozen on my counter. Becuase she knew I’d feel a tinge of crappiness for NOT being able to do all things.**
Sometimes we need someone to come alongside us and see what we can’t. Our blind spot. Sometimes we need someone to say, “Done even.”
In my case…
Don’t even try to do all things.
Dont even think about trying to do all things.
Should she have pushed me? Should she of planted the seed that encouraged me to push through so I could sit in her living room WISHING to God I was anywhere but there because I wanted to be at home with my people after the last half of my day went to hell in a hand basket?
Absolutely not. She knew what was BEST for me. Even if I didn’t.
If you don’t have a friend like that, find one. Find a friend who knows your season. Find a friend who knows your heart. I’d tell you her name but then I’m afraid you’d steal her from me and that would just make me all sad because I’m slightly territorial and jealous by nature. Do yourself a favor, just find someone who walks with Jesus. Like WALKS WITH because I kind of think in the end, He says the same thing when those “SHOULDS” pop into the picture. You know, all those religious things we all agonize one time or another over. “I should. Because.”
Sometimes you need a good kick in the pants to get you moving if you are stuck hiding out in your cave too long. Sometimes you just need someone to see your heart and give you permission to stop the crazy for a bit so you can get off your hamster wheel and rest without making you feel badly for it. Sometimes YOU need to know the difference.
Your value does not increase if you show up and it does decrease if you don’t. Know YOUR capacity then take a moment to see the capacity in others. Give them permission to slow it all down when they need too because chances are, they are caught up in the same vicicious cycle of DO as you are.
Rest is needed folks. It helps you guard that little ole heart of yours, which is a very good thing to DO.