It’s May and May in my world is crazy. As in C-R-A-Z-Y. Like “I’m sorry for things I said in May,” crazy. I keep waking up each day thinking, “If I could just get through this day, this week, this month, then I’ll be ok.” What a terrible way to live, wishing what lay ahead was already done…but hey, sometimes you just get through and hope that along the way, you practiced presence.
So instead of lamenting over all they sordid details of what’s been going on in my real-life May Mayhem, I’ll share with you what I’ve learned is most important because really, that’s where the money is at.
When life gets crazy, here’s how to stay rooted:
- Guard your heart. First and foremost. THIS. Everything you need is right here in these three little words. Your perspective, how you filter your thoughts, your emotions and your actions all flow from this little nugget of wisdom so listen up. Your heart is like living water. If you do not guard it, you will dam it all up as in DAMN IT ALL UP and it goes downhill from there. So build bridges not walls and be careful when you are going through crazy times to stay open, unoffended and compassionate (toward yourself and others **and often it’s the circumstances with others that make you want to erect 10 foot walls but keep it mind, it’s not about others. It is about Y-O-U**). Be responsible for YOUR heart staying open and let others be responsible for theirs…plain and not-so-simple.
- Communicate. First and second foremost. I know for myself THIS right here has been the crux of all my craziness. If communication is honest and consistent, most likely things can be worked through. It doesn’t mean things are agreed upon or all together happy but things can certainly be heading in the right direction and relationships can be safeguarded because when communication gets nixed…it all gets 100% harder. Seriously, you will find yourself playing on a one man team and we all know there is no “I” in “TEAM.” If you are not clearly communicating your part, that stuff goes somewhere and guess what? IT. GOES. SOMEWHERE. Either the dog gets the brunt or your kids do when they ask for milk or some poor soul who pulls out right in front of you as your late for work gets the wave or rear ended. Stuff turns into toxins like anger, bitterness, resentment and offense so back to point 1. **Guard your heart** Are you going to build a bridge or a wall? And lastly, watch your responses…key. Are you reacting or responding? Trying to prove a point and be right? 👈🏻 Not the best reasons AT ALL to open your mouth. TAKE IT FROM ME.
- Take yourself seriously. First and third foremost. I’ve come to realize, you’ve got to take yourself seriously before anyone else will. You need to respect yourself, love yourself, *whatever* yourself. It’s the law of sowing and reaping. What you do and how you think comes back to either bite or embrace you. I’ve realized all of this from contending with my own fear. Yes, sometimes even the most awful feeling or thought can be a good teacher and fear has not only been a trusted friend of mine, but one who has championed for me to step up to the plate by inadvertently trying to keep me away from it. So what happens when you stop being afraid to step up and be WHO you were created to be? What happens when you say, “Fear of fallout, Fear of rejection…you will not stop me! THIS is my standard, THIS is how I respect myself, THIS is who I am and how I lead?” A lot happens. Some will say, “Good for you.” Some will say, “It’s about time” and sadly, some will throw themselves down on the floor and have an adult-size tantrum at your expense because they are used to steering YOUR ship. S-O. Step up. Be prepared for the ground to tremble and the earth to shake because it will look and feel just like that. Trust me, it’s ok. It’s the shaft separating from the wheat. IT NEEDS TO HAPPEN. When you stand solid and firm in WHO you were created to be, *you* BY DEFAULT will call others UP. It’s not your responsibility if they don’t accept that call. It’s not your fault if they decline and then BLAME YOU for being stuck. It is YOUR responsibility to be you, you are in charge of a party of ONE. You being fully you is the best, most kindest thing you can do for mankind. It is the most Jesus you can be to the people on this planet, so please, for the love, take yourself seriously. Don’t dismiss and don’t water down. Respect and love yourself. Your identity is such a gift and is at the core of ALL of it. **Guard it**
I could go on and on because I have created lists, as in l-i-st-s, which is plural but three points is enough and easy to remember. I am certain, if you can just rest in these THREE, everything else begins to make sense and comes into order; things like fixing and forgiving and forgetting. Crazy times can certainly lead to many crazy things and many of those crazy things can be negative. **Let’s not focus there** Crazy times are truly opportunities, like a gym membership **IF YOU USE IT** You can be strengthened in many ways and if you allow the circumstances to shape you, they will shape you into WHO you were created to be **so use the gym membership** If you don’t, crazy times will leave you winded, haggard and feeling like ultimate crap, thereby making your life look and smell like a great big pile of ultimate crap. This is truth, almost scriptural.
And since I am like a 43 year-old broken record: *guard your heart*. Truly. Watch what comes in, watch what goes out. Find that one person who can be your sounding board when all seems lost and whom is not easily swayed when you vent. Better yet, sit with Jesus for extraordinarily long periods of time till your perspective shifts and you can see as He sees, that’s the winning combination right there folks. His perspective is better than ALL (Isaiah 55:9 pretty much sums that one up). *communicate* openly and honestly. It’s not your job to worry what someone thinks or how they will respond when you are open and honest, it is just your job to DO IT. And lastly, *be you* Take charge of YOUR life, don’t let regret creep in because you “should have” and you were too afraid. Know what you want and which direction you need to go in to get you where you need to be and most importantly, stay steadfast to WHO you are through it. And seriously, if you know NOTHING…give yourself permission to figure that all out. YOU are worth the discovery.
All of this will help you love, lead and live in seasons that are nothing short of crazy because there is nothing worse than waking up each day just wanting to get through to the other side just so you can breathe a bit better. Wake up each day and give it your best shot. Lace up your running shoes and lean into your people and lean in tight and if the moment or the day does not go as planned and you SCREW IT ALL UP, begin again.
This is plain and absolutely simple. It’s called grace.
Soon enough your winter will turn into Spring and your Spring into Summer. Seasons don’t last forever nor will your crazy.